By Design

Journeys to same-sex parenthood have become a pretty common plot for queer films. Released in 1982, By Design is a particularly early example of this story. For its time, By Design’s casually positive attitude towards same-sex couples and the possibility of them as parents is full-on radical. But 40 years on, this is something I can only appreciate in the abstract. Writing this review in 2023 means I’ve not only seen lots of films like this but that the real-life attitude towards same-sex parenting has evolved much past what By Design portrays.

The plot is pretty simple. Helen and Angie are a lesbian couple working in fashion. They want a child. They try adoption and sperm donation to no avail. So, they decide to do it the old-fashioned way. The couple decide that a photographer named Terry would be a good father for their child. Terry is a male chauvinist who has it bad for Helen and doesn’t respect her boundaries. On the emotional night when insemination occurs, Angie freaks out and leaves. She meets a young man and has sex with him. Both Angie and Helen wind up pregnant as a result of their night of heterosexual copulation.

Like I mentioned, By Design is part of a large subgenre of same-sex parenting films. One it is particularly close to is the 2017 film, You, Me and Him. Seriously, the plots here are identical. Lesbian couple wants a baby. One member plans a pregnancy, the other has a one-night stand with a male chauvinist. Both also feature one of the women suffering a stillbirth. I can’t stress enough that By Design deserves major kudos for being such an early example of the same-sex parenting film. But honestly? You, Me and Him is the stronger movie.

The problem with By Design is that is both drama and comedy and therefor, neither. The dramatic scenes don’t hit very hard. The comedic scenes are also not funny and have often aged poorly. Terry’s constant sexual harassment up to him physically dragging a protesting Helen into an elevator is played for laughs. It’s uncomfortable. It’s not that the two elements don’t work together, it’s that they tried to split the difference between comedy and drama and ended up in a bland middle ground.

By Design is definitely a message film. Helen and Angie aren’t so much individuals but representatives of good, socially upstanding lesbians who could make good parents. There are definitely worse fates for queer females to be, especially in the 1980’s. The main issue with them is that so little focus is put on their actual partnership. Despite all the time they spend together, they often do come off as platonic partners more than romantic. There’s little chemistry and what was probably a deliberate de-sexing of their relationship. The one romantic scene the two share involves them dancing to a very boring song. With flat voices and completely dead eyes, they declare their love for one another. It’s not fully believable.

Unrelated, but male chauvinist Terry is played by Saul Rubinek. Cool to see someone who had a notable career star in an underground queer film. Despite how awful his character is, he is the most charismatic actor in the film. It’s unsurprising that he got bigger work after By Design. This early role of Rubinek shows a lot of charisma.

By Design really suffers from the fact that it’s been 40 years since its release. This is not a timeless film. What was radical in 1982 is almost commonplace now. And a lot of the comedy in the film is horrific more than comedic by today’s standards. By Design definitely deserves major cred for being a queer positive film in 1982. But watching it in 2022 is an unremarkable experience.

Overall rating: 5.7/10

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