Uranus 2324

Uranus 2324 is a project made to capitalize on this existing popularity of its two stars, Rebecca Patricia ‘Becky’ Armstrong and Freen Sarocha Chankimha. Apparently, these women had a TV series that garnered them attention as individuals and as a potential couple. And someone turned that interest into a large scope, sci-fi lesbian romance movie full of romantic indulgence. Congratulations to everyone who this project was made for. I hope you enjoyed it. Being unfamiliar with these women’s work beforehand, Uranus 2324 lacked an immediate draw for me. While I admire the motive of this project and its scope, I don’t actually think Uranus 2324 is good.

Freen and Becky’s characters are already a couple at the start of the film, though circumstances keep them apart. Becky plays Kath, who lives most of her life in Boston, often only returning to Thailand to visit her mother or enter into freediving competitions. Meanwhile, Freen plays Linlada, an accomplished scientist who is set to go to space, breaking barriers for Thai people and women alike. Though in a moment where Kath is freediving and Linlada is doing uh, space stuff, something weird occurs. Suddenly, Kath finds herself somewhere else, both back in time and in an alternate universe where her father is still alive. But this location is just the first of several time and universe-spanning trips Kath will find herself on, each with one thing in common. the love Kath and Linlada share is a constant. But so too are forces that prevent them from being together.

I appreciate the thought behind making a multi universe-spanning lesbian love story. That’s the scope of this film I want to champion. Unfortunately, I think the plot and universe building in Uranus 2324 to be rather weak. We don’t universe hop until almost an hour in. Then, we spend too much time in the first universe. The following examples of alternate timelines feel rushed and unsatisfactory. And there’s so much set up in the first act which turns out to not even be strictly relevant. So many of my problems with this movie is that it’s indulgent without quality to that indulgence. This half-baked multi universe story is one of them.

Another indulgence is how the film presents romance. I don’t know these women or their relationship which means I don’t really care when any moment with them is slowed down and given romantic music. The movie just stops so they can eat an ice cream cone for a good minute and a half. Sure, the shot of them sharing is cute. Then, that shot becomes a whole scene and again, I do not know these women. The film also indulges in its characters being badass. One alternate universe is during war. And all of a sudden, Kath can kick ass. We haven’t seen this before from her, nor is there dialogue explaining that she has training. The movies stops dead to let her effortlessly beat up a bunch of army guys. Wish fulfillment isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but there’s no backing quality to the wish fulfillment in Uranus 2324.

The thing that really tanked the film for me was the dialogue. This movie was rough whenever people spoke. The English dialogue is particularly bad. Whether that’s an issue of it being a second language for cast and crew or it being my first language so I notice it more, I don’t know. All I know is that the movie was extremely clunky with exposition. And there’s numerous scene, especially with the freediving judges that seem to be outright improv. God bless that diving judge actor for hitting all the necessary information they presumably gave him to say. But an actor is not a writer and those scenes really lack polish. Even the scenes that were presumably written down also lack personality, subtly, nuance and theme. People just sort of say what’s happening in the most blunt, slightly awkward way imaginable.

If you’re someone who enjoyed Uranus 2324, I am genuinely happy for you. This is harmless, indulgent wish fulfillment that puts a lesbian relationship as something that spans multiple universes and timelines . I so badly want to share in that joy. But this is not a well-executed project on almost any level. Every moment that’s not about the romance is awkward at best. And even the romantic moments have used the existing fanbase to skip over any sort of development to just offering lengthy, romantic moments. The sheer indulgence of all of this makes the film come off as juvenile and makes me feel ancient and cranky for not enjoying it.

Overall rating: 4.7/10

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