Wild Things: Diamonds in the Rough

It’s not like I expected a direct-to-dvd sequel to Wild Things to be some bastion of inclusive and respectful depictions of women. Quite the opposite. Before I started the movie, I acknowledged to myself that the movie was probably going to be misogynistic. I believed I had prepared myself. I was wrong. By the 10 minute mark of Wild Things: Diamonds in the Rough, I was nauseated by the misogyny on display. And the movie just kept going.

The film opens with high school student, Marie and her stepfather, Jay discussing whether Marie should inherit $4 million worth of diamonds left to her by her late mother. At Marie’s 18th birthday, both she and the stepfather have interactions with a classmate of Marie named Elena. Elena is a bad girl. You know this because she has an ankle monitor and a parole officer. The party ends when Elena accuses Jay of rape. But it’s not as simple as all of that. These scheming teenagers have plans to get their hands on the diamonds.

Of course, the Wild Things series largely exists to be tepid softcore porn. The thriller elements takes up more run time, but the film’s purpose is to be sexy. And you know what’s sexy? Rape investigations! This was one of the most grotesque elements of the film. False rape allegations made by beautiful teenagers to ruin an “innocent” man’s life. Plus, there’s a scene where Elena has a rape kit done and she’s wearing a very cute push-up bra. Like we all would, I’m sure. Gotta make sure the doctor knows that you’re wearing cute underwear while they treat your body like a piece of evidence. There’s a lot of rape in this movie for a film that’s supposed to be sexy. Thankfully (?) the final plot twist is that actually, Jay did do a rape. It was just a different rape than the one he got accused for.

So much of this movie is demonizing barely legal, beautiful women. It’s part of a larger culture that did this and still does today. And frankly, I don’t understand it. I hope to never understand feeling such hatred and disdain towards the very people you find attractive. Diamonds in the Rough is a mixture of dehumanizing close-ups of women with zero body fat in bikinis mixed with the same women affirming every worst stereotype about beautiful women. They’re all duplicitous, manipulative and I don’t think any of these female characters actually enjoys sex. It’s just a tool for their manipulations. If any men are reading this review, I promise you. Just because that hot girl lives in your brain rent free doesn’t mean she’s trying to steal your diamonds or do a long con that ruins your life.

Really, the only positive about this film is that the plot is about fucking diamonds. That’s so quaint. Jewellery theft as a motive is an adorable throwback. The rest of the crime and thriller plot of the movie is a series of double-crosses and secret alliances that barely work because these characters are all so one-dimensional. At one point we learn that Marie has a partner in crime int the form of her school’s student president. Okay, so? Well, I guess the “so” is so they can have a threesome scene with Elena. After that, student president is sometimes portrayed as the real brains of the operation. Which I find offensive, but I’ll admit that’s in direct contradiction to my previous paragraph. Turns out the one thing I hate more than a 18 year old girl being manipulative is when it’s actually a dude who’s doing most of the planning.

Wild Things: Diamonds in the Rough comes from a culture of deep misogyny. I wish this film was dated in these views, but we’re not far enough out from 2005 for that to be the case. In 2024, this story would be an incel ragebait post you’d see on Reddit. And I’m not thrilled about that. But at least those Reddit posts aren’t a 87 minutes long and have a budget of hundreds of thousands. Films like Diamonds in the Rough affirm and perpetuate a seriously negative view of women. Conventionally attractive women are exclusive duplicitous and manipulative. And everyone else? Fat women, women over 40, anyone who isn’t thin, white and barely legal? They’re not there at all. Diamonds in the Rough created an idealized, misogynistic world where the only women in it are hot. And then made the choice to hate all the women it just made up.

Overall rating: 2/10

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